Fresh Prints of Bel Air (Ricky Weekly #76)

This is where I share 3 things every week with my friends and anyone else interested.
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A picture from my life:

I went to eat at a Chinese restaurant and saw that Hungry Panda (Doordash for Overseas Chinese) gave them branded black leather check presenters just like how the credit card companies did back in the day to get restaurants to accept them. Nice!

A thing on my mind:

Warning: I don’t have a well-formed thought this week, so instead I’ll share a few developing ones and maybe I’ll write more once they become clear to me. Feel free to write me back to engage to help me find more clarity.

Zone of genius

I don’t think about my “zone of genius” much, even though I probably should. The challenge is that our company is too early stage. I have to do all the jobs even if I suck at them just long enough to get by or until we hire someone who is much better than me. The other thing is I’m too much of a people pleaser, so I care more about everyone else around me getting into their zones of geniuses first. The third thing is I don’t think I’m good at anything, so then again time is better spent enabling others to be their best. That’s ultimately selfish though because I have surrounded myself with people who want me to be my best.

Navigating uncertainty

The zone of genius topic came up with a founder friend, and he said what if the genius is in “navigating uncertainty.” What does that even mean? How do you navigate uncertainty? For some, being good at navigating uncertainty is to be good at gaining control over the elements and charting a way forward. What does the data say? What do we have to work with? Quickly turn uncertainty into solvable problems that we can work on. For my friend, it’s having built up a story in his head about how there’s no going back, how bleak anything other than forward seems, and staying forward-looking, believing that you will find a way. I’m more the latter, which feels more faith-based than anything but important because at the end of the day it’s just the stories we delude ourselves with.

Stories

Building a consumer product like Flow Club has made me appreciate the power of stories. The story is the product. The better the story, the more you get out of it. I’ve written about this before on how products spark desire, and I continue to think about how to help Flow Club tell a better story. Our community does a decent job. They talk about how the best part of Flow Club is the people they’ve met, or how it restored their humanity as they languished during the pandemic, or just how it helps them get ready to enjoy the weekend or take a vacation, or the opposite and fight the sunday scaries, or simply develop a reading habit. I’m looking to get more sophisticated about improving our storytelling and build the product that helps people live that story.

A piece of content I recommend:

Will - Audiobook narrated by Will Smith

“What’s on Chris Rock’s face? Fresh Prints!”

I had just finished listening to Will Smith’s memoir when I saw the news about the slap heard around the world. I wasn’t feeling Will Smith as much after listening to the book, but it’s hard to pinpoint why. I admire his self-awareness and the journey he took to become a better person, but it’s hard for me to shake how much of an overbearing asshole he was, especially because he couches everything he does in his love for everyone else.

It’s a good book though. He narrates it himself and sprinkled in some rap and funny impressions. Some parts hit me pretty hard. Sharing some quotes below.

On why he prioritizes his dreams above all else:

How can we fully pursue and realize our visions while at the same time cultivating love, a thriving family and fulfilling relationships? And here’s the harsh reality for everyone who loves a dreamer. Everything comes second to the dream. The attainment became an act of survival. In my darkest nights, my dream saved my life. It was my light, my food. My vision of brighter days sustained me. It was my whole purpose. I saw my hopes as a ticket to a better life. To joy, fulfillment, security, safety. I saw the realization of my dreams as my only road to love and happiness. Failure equals death. My belief was when I get to the top of this mountain, I will never be scared again.

On his distrust of feelings:

People determine whether or not you love them by how well you feel they honor their feelings. This has been a precarious conundrum in my adult relationships. I have always been less concerned about someone’s feelings than someone’s overall well-being. People in my life have consistently complained about feeling unconsidered by me…I would walk through fire for the people I love. I am fully prepared to die for my family. But no, I haven’t always focused on their feelings. I don’t trust feelings. Feelings come and go like the weather. You can’t plan anything around them. And just because someone feels something, doesn’t make it true. Just because your feelings are extreme, doesn’t mean you’re right…People care less about facts, truths, probabilities or intentions than they do about how they feel and how well you have displayed that you care about those feelings. When we open sentences with “the fact of the matter is…,” they’re thinking “I just talked for ten minutes, I done told you what my fact of the matter is.” Or if we say, “look, here’s the reality,” the other person is thinking, “asshole, I just told you the reality.”

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As always, you can find out what I’m thinking in more real-time on Twitter and my essays are on my website. My primary focus (and where I focus) is on Flow Club. We are hiring and offering a $10k referral bonus + VIP tickets to SFJAZZ or Sacramento Kings game.